How to get over childhood trauma
If you were abused as a child, you may think that the damage is done and that there’s no way to free yourself from the effects of that abuse. But this is far from true. There are things you can do to work through your past and present experiences with abuse so that you can move on with your life empowered and healthy.
Some people may not even realize that they were abused as children. This is because child abuse can take many forms, including emotional, physical, and sexual abuse. If you experienced any type of abuse as a child, it’s important to remember that it was not your fault and that you can do so much more than you had ever imagined possible.
One of the best things you can do is to seek the right professional help and guidance, through good therapists and life coaches. You also can and should devote quality investment of time to studies through quality courses and books so that you can do valuable self-work along the way. This will help you understand what happened to you, work through the pain, heal your wounds and help you develop powerful emotional tools and life skills.
What are the emotional tools and life skills that you need?
- Learn how to love and respect yourself – if you don’t love and respect yourself, nobody else will. This isn’t about being narcissistic or egotistical. It’s about developing a healthy level of self-esteem and self-worth.
- Set boundaries – know what your limits are and stick to them. Don’t let anyone treat you in a way that you don’t want to be treated. This includes setting boundaries with yourself – don’t allow yourself to continue any patterns of self-destructive behavior.
- Communicate effectively – learn how to express yourself in a clear and concise way. This includes being assertive, not aggressive. It’s also important to be a good listener.
- Develop healthy coping mechanisms – when life gets tough, you need to have healthy ways of dealing with stress and adversity. This could include things like exercise, journaling, or spending time with supportive people
Reasons You Need to Know that you can move beyond childhood trauma is that
If you don’t know that you can heal and move beyond child abuse, you are likely to not truly take action to move on and heal. This can cause a vicious cycle where you stay stuck in the pain of your past and never move on to a healthier future.
- You will continue to blame yourself – child abuse is never the victim’s fault. No matter what anyone says, it was not your fault and you can do something about it. Blaming yourself will only keep you trapped in the cycle of abuse.
- You will have a difficult time trusting people – if you don’t trust yourself, it will be hard to trust other people. This can lead to isolation and loneliness.
- You will struggle with healthy relationships – if you don’t have a healthy relationship with yourself, it will be difficult to have healthy relationships with other people. This could manifest as difficulty in romantic relationships, friendships, or even work relationships.
- You will continue to experience the negative effects of child abuse – these could include things like anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and even physical health problems.
Step-by-Step Instructions to moving beyond childhood trauma
Just like having a fit body takes working out regularly, a healthy emotional state needs a good regular emotional habit-building workout. It takes time but just like working out to get fit, the alternative is being emotionally flabby. You don’t want that. You want to be strong, healthy, and happy.
So let’s work out!
- Love yourself – every day make a list of things you love about yourself. Include your strengths, your skills, your talents, your accomplishments, and your personality traits. Read this list aloud to yourself every day.
- Respect yourself – every day make a list of things you respect about yourself. Include your values, your morals, your standards, and your boundaries. Read this list aloud to yourself every day.
- Forgive yourself – every day make a list of things you need to forgive yourself for. Include your mistakes, your shortcomings, and your imperfections. Read this list aloud to yourself every day.
- Appreciate yourself – every day make a list of things you appreciate about yourself. Include your accomplishments, your successes, and your positive qualities. Read this list aloud to yourself every day.
- Compliment yourself – every day give yourself at least one genuine compliment. This could be about your hard work, your skills, your talents, or your personality traits.
Self-love is a journey, not a destination. It’s an ongoing process of discovering who you are and learning to love yourself just as you are. Be patient with yourself and celebrate every step forward. Remember that you are worthy of love and respect.
Additionally, you need to…
Make yourself, your number one priority project and begin a good solid self-care routine that you follow every single day. This means making time for yourself to do things that make you happy, help you relax, and nurture your mind, body, and soul. It might include things like reading, writing, hiking, yoga, meditation, spending time in nature, getting a massage, or listening to calming music. Find what works for you and make it a priority
After you have the previous steps solid in your daily life, add doing one action that moves you forward into your true passion every single day. This could be something like writing 500 words on that novel you’ve been wanting to write, painting for 20 minutes, taking a dance class, or networking with people in your field. Do something every day that gets you closer to your dream and watch your life begin to change in wonderful ways.
And finally, always remember that YOU are in control of your life. No one else is living your life but you, so make it a life that you love. Be kind to yourself, be patient with yourself, and believe in yourself. You can do anything you set your mind to!
After you have those things that you practice every day solid, start mindfully letting go of worrying about what other people think of you and bring your focus to what your ethics tell you about you and follow your ethics.
This will help you to focus on taking care of yourself and not get so wrapped up in what other people think about you. If you always live by what other people think about you, then you are never going to be able to find your own path or true identity.
So, these three things: Self-love, living by your own ethics, and mindfully letting go of what other people think about you will help you to start creating a life that you love! And remember, it’s a journey…enjoy the ride!
These three steps practiced will take you powerfully far into the path of becoming a person with healthy fit self-esteem.
Start on them this very moment and watch your emotional life unfold in a direction that you have never truly known.
